I Think We Know Which List He’s On
Posted by Mimi on December 24th, 2011 filed in Humor, Life, ParentingComment now »
Twas two weeks before Christmas, when throughout our lovely abode,
All were sleeping, while wee-one filled the dishwasher with an odd load.
The dishes had been placed in the dishwasher with care,
Then topped off with stuff, until not a spot was bare.
His Mom and Dad were nestled all snug in our bed,
While visions of peace and solitude danced in our heads.
Then down in the kitchen there arose such a clatter,
Dave sprang from our bed to see what was the matter.
To the top of the stairs I flew like a flash,
Then down to the kitchen to see it was TRASHED!
As I blinked to bring my eyes into focus,
I was surprised at whose antics had woke us.
I gazed at the appliance that now held an odd kind of soup,
I knew in a moment the chef was named “Coop”
He named each item aloud, and in the dishwasher they went,
All of his prized ingredients.
“In Oven Mitts, in Apples, and Bananas, in Office Supplies!”
“In Home Phone, and Cell Phone”, I heard his excited cries.
“Now Medical Gloves and Tubing, Spices still stuck in the Spice Rack!”
Then in went Garlic Powder, and the container, and he didn’t look back.
Lots of Organic Cocoa, some Powdered Green Drink and their containers, sprinkled near and far,
The canister of flour, the sprinkled Pepper (and of course, its jar).
In went some important papers, a bottle of hand soap– actually, two.
Then a large bottle of dish-washing soap was tossed in on cue.
A Baseball display case: in the bloated appliance it went!
Finally, he pushed the start button to complete his naughty experiment.
We rounded the corner and he knew he had been caught,
but not before he terrorized our beloved coffee pot!
(for pics, scroll all the way down, ignoring the odd spaces between them)
3 oven mitts
Box of medical gloves (almost full)
Pens
Hi-lighters
Brand new LARGE bottle of garlic powder
Garlic powder container
Pepper
Pepper Container
Huge canister of Organic cocoa (about 1 1/2 pounds)
Cocoa container
Green Vibrance powdered green drink
Green Vibrance container
Spice rack with three spices still inside
3 large Apples
2 Bananas
Paper with important phone #s
House phone
Cell phone
Flour container
Dish soap bottle (filled)
2 Hand soap containers (filled)
Medical tubing
Baseball display case
Possibly more, it was 4:30am
Art Imitating Life
Posted by Mimi on November 12th, 2011 filed in Humor, Lyme, Rant, UncategorizedComment now »
You all know my story: I contracted Lyme, no doctor would take me seriously, and phrases such as “you don’t have Lyme,” (despite a VERY HIGH POSITIVE test that my doctor was required to report to the Center for Disease Control) and “Lyme doesn’t exist in Texas” were spouted out by numerous docs. The first “Lyme Literate” doctor to treat me was pressured to shut down his offices. He was a doctor for 35 years before he started treating Lyme patients. One year later he was closed. Gone.
Despite the fact that my state has high numbers of Lyme in animals, human doctors still won’t admit to the basic truth: Lyme exists in Texas, the ticks can’t read a map.
Because I wasn’t treated immediately, I now have “Chronic Lyme,” another thing which docs don’t believe exists. I have suffered physically agony and disability because of doctors’ and insurance companies’ arrogance, stupidity, and greed.
Apparently, however, doctor arrogance isn’t just a problem here, as this clever animation artist depicts an experience amazingly similar to mine.
Doctors expect us to believe that Lyme diseased ticks and other biting insects just simply do not exist in Texas (a near perfect environment for them, incidentally), and that our animals that have Lyme must have vacationed in Connecticut recently, or possibly that Texans have different blood than people from other states, or ticks are scared to cross the state line into Texas (it must be our strict border patrol).
Amazingly, they spout off statements such as “Lyme disease doesn’t exist in Texas,” yet they chastise you for making a statement such as “I have Lyme disease,” even while you are holding a positive Lyme test in your hand.
Either way, I won’t put my faith in a person who make such an ignorant statement.
The Devil is in the Details
Posted by Mimi on September 19th, 2011 filed in Battle of the Sexes, Life, RantComment now »
Pat Robertson believes that Gay Marriage is wrong, immoral, and is the “beginning in a long downward slide.” According to him, if we support Gays it will lead to God destroying America. He states that every civilization who has ever supported homosexuality or has turned away from traditional marriage was destroyed.
Interesting.
Just recently, when someone wrote to him about a friend whose wife has Alzheimer’s, Robertson suggested the man divorce his wife and “start all over.” When confronted about the whole “’til death do us part’” clause in most wedding vows, his response was to point out that Alzheimer’s is a “kind of death.”
He is a “kind of ” hypocritical dick.
I have written new vows that seem more in line with his thinking about traditional marriages:
I take you to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold (when I want you, and to discard when things don’t go as planned), from this day forward (or until a day in the future which I deem the end of our marriage), for better, (but not) for worse, for richer, for poorer (you agree to no more than a 5% decrease in annual earnings), in (brief) sickness or in health, to love and to cherish ’til death do us part (or things that are not actually death, but I reserve the right to call a “kind of” death after which I will dump you off at the nursing home and “start all over”). And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness (some restrictions apply).
Now, don’t misunderstand me. I am not judging people for ending marriages for reasons they felt appropriate or safe. I believe most divorces only come about after people have worked hard at saving the marriage.
I just can’t get over the hypocrisy of him saying that God will destroy us if we turn against traditional marriage and allow gay people to wed, but it is perfectly okay for non-gay people to get married and bail out when our partner gets sick. Isn’t that turning away from our wedding vows and traditional marriage?
This isn’t about the sanctity of marriage. It is about not wanting to give rights to another group to enjoy something that we haven’t even figured out yet.
Say What?
Posted by Mimi on July 10th, 2011 filed in Battle of the Sexes, Humor, ParentingComment now »
Item #532 to file under “Things I Never Thought I Would Hear Myself Say,”
“Cooper, please don’t fart on your bread.”
Free Movie Extended
Posted by Mimi on June 14th, 2011 filed in Healing, Life Isn't Fair, Lyme, Rant, TumorComment now »
The movie I mentioned here is now being shown free through June 20th, so if you didn’t have a chance to watch it already, consider doing so. It is a documentary about Cancer, a medical pioneer, greed, deceit, and our government. It will open your eyes. Knowledge is power!
Burzynski: Cancer Is Serious Business
Posted by Mimi on June 13th, 2011 filed in Healing, Life Isn't Fair, Lyme, Rant, TumorComment now »
This movie is free to watch until midnight tonight. I watched it last night and I am still in shock! I found it very compelling.
Burzynski: Cancer Is Serious Business (click here to watch)
If you or a loved-one suffers from a chronic disease or Cancer, please educate yourself about our health care policies and the pharmaceutical industry. Most people have no idea about the corruption involved in our medical system. If you follow the money, things usually start to make sense.
As a lymie, I have had my fair share of frustration w/ our medical system and the Texas Medical Board.
We need to change our system. The first step is knowledge.
Happy Mom’s Day!
Posted by Mimi on May 8th, 2011 filed in Battle of the Sexes, Humor, Life, ParentingComment now »
I have only had this job for 4 years, but this is what I have learned so far:
1) Raising a 4-year old boy is like raising a college aged boy. They both have the same dance moves, both like to streak, both are always spilling their drinks and getting crumbs everywhere, and there is always a mess that involves puke or pee.
2) Safety scissors suck. How do we expect kids to develop fine motor skills when we give them something that couldn’t cut water?
3) Sometimes it is really hard not to yell. Sometimes it is impossible.
4) The male species’ penis fascination starts at about 6 months of age, and ends as about . . . never.
5) This is by far the most important job I have ever had, my job performance is much more important than it has been in any job before it. I get no financial compensation, I put in a lot more hours, never get a vacation, and I am on call 24/7. My boss can be a real tyrant sometimes. But, the bonuses are great.
6) If you live in the country and let your son pee outside, don’t be surprised when he drops his shorts, arches his back, and pees on the edge of the playground in front of everyone during a classmate’s birthday party. Or, when he drops his backpack and artwork on the sidewalk and tries to pee in the flower garden in front of his school.
7) Things that used to totally gross me out don’t even register in my brain anymore.
8) I don’t know how moms of twins do it. Never mind moms of triplets.
9) No matter how many times I tell Coop the underwear flap goes in front, he is still going to put them on backwards and wear them that way all day. As long as they are clean and dry, I don’t care.
10) I never knew a bouquet of Mother’s Day “flowers” made from construction paper cut-outs of Cooper’s hand-prints taped to colorful pipe cleaners and wrapped in pink tissue paper could mean so much.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Osama is Dead
Posted by Mimi on May 2nd, 2011 filed in Life Isn't Fair, RantComment now »
When I heard the news, I was shocked. Then happy our nation’s long term goal was accomplished, while simultaneously being aware we aren’t any safer than we were 24 hours earlier. Then, as I gazed at the pictures of Osama Bin Laden, I felt sad.
Sad that this man had so much hatred for other humans. Sad that he wanted to harm innocent people. Sad for the terrorism he lived with in his own heart.
“I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.
I am sad he lived a life of wanting to destroy or take away others lives, and I am sad that the families of 9/11 victims still can’t hug their loved ones tonight.
Word To Your Mother
Posted by Mimi on April 17th, 2011 filed in Humor, ParentingComment now »
This morning I was walking down the stairs headed directly toward the coffee pot. Cooper was already downstairs, so he rushed to the landing and called up:
“Good morning, Mommy!” He said, enthusiastically.
Feeling very loved and appreciated, I sang my response:
“Good morning to you, sweet Cooper, good morning to you, my love. . “
“Don’t sing that one Mommy, sing the cool one.” He interrupted.
“Which one is that?” I asked.
“Ice Ice, Baby!”
I have created a monster.
Your Vote Counts
Posted by Mimi on March 22nd, 2011 filed in Animals, LymeComment now »
It is time for the annual Nascar/Toyota contest. There is a “Lyme Disease Awareness” car that really needs your vote. There is no registration required and it just takes a second. You can vote every day.
Don’t forget that Lyme research benefits animals, too.
We are currently in first place. Lets keep it that way.