Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

I guess the honeymoon is over between my Lyme doctor and I. We have joked with each other in the past, but yesterday his comment had a slightly passive aggressive vibe to it. I don’t do passive aggressive very well.

He just prescribed me a new medication that is supposed to help with my pain. He told me to start slowly by taking one pill a night for seven days, and then start taking one at night and one in the morning. He asked me to call him after I had taken it once and report to him whether or not it helped. It did help, so I called to tell him so and our conversation went like this:

Doc: “Great! Start taking two at night and one each morning.”

Me: “That isn’t too fast? I thought I was supposed to increase my dosage slowly.”

Doc: “No, that’s fine.”

Me: “Really? It will be okay to ramp up that quickly?”

Doc: (rudely) “No. I am trying to kill you.”

Wow. That pissed me off. It makes me want to pummel him with whichever body part doesn’t hurt next time I see him. And, let me tell you, Doctor Smartypants, IT DOESN’T FEEL GOOD TO BE PUMMELED BY AN EYELASH OR AN EARLOBE!

Maybe if I keep taking this medicine I will have more pummeling body-part choices.